If you love someone, let them go. This is a hard statement to swallow sometimes. Why on earth would you want to let someone go if you love them? All we want is to hold them close, keep them near. Often, those we love make us feel so good that we cannot imagine letting them go. Maybe, it's all in how you look at it. I think that letting someone go, although it may not be easy, is the most selfless thing you can do. If you put restraints on a person, they will eventually resent you. Letting someone go is to let them BE. Let them reach for their dreams and support them, no matter what.
Perhaps their dreams are to travel and see the world. Let them go, let them be. Send your love with them and they will feel it and know that you are always there. They will know they can trust you and count on you. Your heart may ache when they are not with you, but knowing that they are living the life they choose, the life that brings them happiness, is worth it.
Even if the person you need to let go is ill, you must let them go. There are always stories of people in hospitals and hospice that hang on to life while their family members are there, but once the family leaves or the person is told it's okay to go, they pass. Why would you want a loved one in pain or with no quality of life to live for you? Because you don't want to loose them? Your pain will heal, let them go.
What if it is your child? What if they want to leave for college or the service? What if they don't want to anything spectacular with their life? What if they have different views than you? You should not force your idea of who they should be upon them. Let them be who they are. Of course you can guide them and teach them good character, but don't try and change the core of who they are to fit what you envisioned them to be.
Don't ever limit a person. Be it your partner, your child, your friend. Love them, let them be who they are and spread their wings and fly!!
~Kia Kaha~
I felt the need to share with you that ever since I read this particular entry, I have been seeing the concept of letting go everywhere! My thoughts immediately after reading it were like, “Yes, what the Buddhists have been teaching for centuries. I know all of this. I hope her words can help someone who doesn’t ‘get it’ like I do.” Oh, how life shows us our arrogance and brings us back to humility!
ReplyDeleteAbout a week later my birthday books came in the mail. These I’ve had on my Amazon wish list for awhile and had forgotten exactly what they were about or if I even still wanted them. Wow! Both are very different in their approach to teaching but at the root of each are about letting go. How weird is that!? I’m definitely more aware of synchronicities that happen in my life than in the past but this one was pretty obvious. It was like the V8 I didn’t know I needed :) - http://youtu.be/_VZxE6pW_to
Anyways, even though I “got” the examples you gave, I began to notice that ANY stressful thought I have, no matter how trivial, can always be traced back to how something is either not meeting my expectations, judgments of what is good and bad (I’m the expert ya know!?!), or I’ve assigned a negative meaning to it. I’m convinced that the secret to happiness, enlightenment, transcendence, whatever you want to call it can all go back to surrendering and letting go.
So, thank you for your post!